chapter 3: part 1. "I Should Do What?"

continued from Chapter 2: part 5
The practical side of me kicked in about this time and I was thinking a lot about how Hal’s death would impact on our lives. We will all get around to dying and when we do, we will leave this planet stark naked, no baggage allowed but we can plan for what we leave behind.

A life-threatening illness is a good motivating force. Your mind turns again and again to the implications of dying; it’s like poking your tongue into a new cavity. Have we got enough money? Can we afford our present life style? The questions run round and round, and common sense dictates that you get these questions settled quickly in order to get on with the business of life.

In the early days of his illness, Hal and I talked in a detached way about the possibility of his dying. It was as though we were speaking of something that might happen to a stranger, but we knew no matter how fuzzy our thinking, that we had business to get out of the way.

I’m a list maker. We sat down together to discuss these worries and this is the list we drew up for Hal:

v Write personal letters to family members or do an audio tape. ( never done)
v Write own obit. ( never done)
v Order lumber to rebuild sagging back porch. (ever practical).
v Call Lawyer to discuss updating will and ask whether Pat needs power of attorney for future.
v Call Real Estate friends about appraising house for possibility of selling.

Nowhere does it say, what are our assets? Are we okay?

We began by getting our wills in order. You can buy a will kit at a stationary store and do your own or blow the hundred bucks or go see a qualified lawyer, once who specializes in estates. You may think you haven’t enough worldly goods to bother, but remember, someone has to distribute your things, and why not have it done your way?

We made an appointment with the lawyer who handled Hal’s one-person company. Our existing wills were done years before when the children were still dependents and a lot of tidying up was due. This should have been a simple assignment but it turned out to be a nightmare.

To be continued in chapter 3: part 2